1. |
Kroger Thunderdome
01:50
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That bitch took the last fucking turkey in the store
And I'm going to fucking punch her she's a stupid whore
I'm so glad I didn't wear heels today cause I'm gonna chase that bitch
She's got one of this season's Michael Kors bags I bet she's fucking rich
I need that turkey you're a cunt
I need that turkey for my family
She's going to ruin my Thanksgiving
Chase her down with my shopping cart and maybe wheel it at her
Please baby stop crying cause you're attracting too much attention
That fake-breasted bitch how the hell did she get the last turkey here
I promised your father we'd have a good Thanksgiving this year
How did she make it to the checkout line before me
Entitled fucking rich girl I bet she lives in First Colony
I guess we're having ham this year I hope your dad doesn't yell at me
It doesn't matter that's what he gets for that secret vacation with his secretary
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2. |
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Thanksgiving's not happening this year
They put up Christmas stuff right after Halloween
And I'm working and I fear
That maybe they couldn't make enough money off food somehow
And Thanksgiving got canceled this year
Corporate america has a great way of ruining things I love
Like indie rock, Holidays and videogames
Go fuck yourselves you fucking assholes
I'll skullfuck your fucking fuck fuck
Stay away from Thanksgiving
Don't laugh because you're part of the problem
You bought a Mumford and Sons album
Instead of one from a better band
If you had bought from Bandcamp your $10 woulda gone straight to them
And they could've bought a day or two of food
I can rant about dumb paranoid shit as much as I want
Because nobody's listening to this song.
And I'll probably never play it live
And it won't fucking matter
I can't believe you listened to this whole dumb song
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3. |
Food Coma 3000
02:07
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I'm gonna eat so much Turkey till I pass out
So I can avoid talking to family for too long
Always making awkward judgement calls
And asking why I don't play Christian rock
And if a God exists I don't even think I'd play it
Cause it sucks, most of it sucks
Except the Bad Brains but they don't claim themselves as that
And they're black and smoke pot so no one in that scene would accept them even if they love Jesus
One day I'll be head of a household and have to run Thanksgiving
That'll be interesting I guess
I hope I can figure out how to cut a turkey and stuff before that happens
I have about 20 years before that so I'll worry about it then
Gonna go into a food coma and have weird dreams
Then go meet up with Jimmy and go black friday shopping
My stomach feels like that dude's head at the beginning of Scanners
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4. |
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This is not a song about how we fucked over the indians
This is not a song about how we fucked over the indians
White people kinda suck in general
Most people kinda suck in general
Be thankful for the people you know who don't suck
Be thankful for the people you know who don't suck
You should hug them and you should stuff them with food
Love each other because you could die in an hour
Love each other because you could die in minutes
Call your best friend and tell them you love them
Call your mom if you're on good terms
Stuff your face something something America
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GUWANGE Houston, Texas
RIP 2010-2014.
My new band as of the 2020's is called Yarler, please check us out at www.yarler.website
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